Saturday, August 18, 2012

When the darkness closes in...

As August slowly ushers in the changing seasons in nature,
it also ushers in a subtle current of sadness.

It is a time to mourn.

Some years it sneaks in almost unexpectedly,
a feeling that you can't quite put your finger on.
Some years it explodes fierce and out of control.
This year, I watch for it.  I recognize it.  I let it be what it is.
This year, I'm trying hard to grieve with gratitude.

~ ~ ~

When we first moved back to town, we became reacquainted with Ray, a dear old friend of my Dad. Ray would walk past our house on his daily route and always stop to say "hi" to the kids and reminisce with us about the history of people and places he loved in this town.

One of those people he loved was my Dad.

Ray told us many stories, but one I hold close to my heart:
my Dad at the funeral for his young son.

This was not Dad's first loss. It was one of many in his lifetime.

Ray was at the funeral.  He stood there in line, wondering what to say to his friend, my Dad. What do you say to a man who has lost so much already? Before Ray could find the words, my Dad reached for Ray's hand and confidently proclaimed what he believed:

"The Lord gives and the Lord takes away.  
Blessed be the name of the Lord."

~ ~ ~

 I love that I have this story of my Dad's unwavering faith.
I love that all these years later his testimony, passed on through a witness,
 still stands fresh and bold in my heart.

I love that I can say it too.

I will still mourn. Tears will still flow. And I will still say,

"The Lord gives and the Lord takes away. 
Blessed be the name of the Lord."


  1. lots of tears here. So beautiful.

  2. Beautiful.
    So nice to see Dad's face.
    Love you sis,

  3. Ohh momma, your posts about Grandpa & Grandma never fail to make me tear-up... I miss them a lot, too. Grandpa was such a handsome man, I wish I could have met him and heard his stories. I also miss Ray, and I wish I could remember the stories he told us! All I remember is his pocket full of Mentos, and the comb he always had in another pocket. :)
    I want to have a faith like Grandpa's.

    Love you so much! xoxo

  4. beautiful... your summer and spring posts may have been few but i just went and re-read them all... you have a lovely way of speaking through your words and pictures... speaks to my heart. :)

  5. Kristi, as I read of your Dad, I see his face and his gentle smile. Makes us so thankful we had those vacations and visits in our memory bank. We talk of them often....and of course, in our minds eye, you are that precious little girl again. Each of you and your brothers and sisters carry certain traits of your parents that is proof of the beauty and purpose of their lives. Love you so much!