When the darkness closes in...

As August slowly ushers in the changing seasons in nature,

it also ushers in a subtle current of sadness.

It is a time to mourn.

Some years it sneaks in almost unexpectedly,
a feeling that you can't quite put your finger on.
Some years it explodes fierce and out of control.
This year, I watch for it.  I recognize it.  I let it be what it is.

This year, I'm trying hard to grieve with gratitude.

~ ~ ~

When we first moved back to town, we became reacquainted with Ray, a dear old friend of my Dad. Ray would walk past our house on his daily route and always stop to say "hi" to the kids and reminisce with us about the history of people and places he loved in this town.

One of those people he loved was my Dad.

Ray told us many stories, but one I hold close to my heart:

my Dad at the funeral for his young son.

This was not Dad's first loss. It was one of many in his lifetime.

Ray was at the funeral.  He stood there in line, wondering what to say to his friend, my Dad. What do you say to a man who has lost so much already? Before Ray could find the words, my Dad reached for Ray's hand and confidently proclaimed what he believed:

"The Lord gives and the Lord takes away.  
Blessed be the name of the Lord."

~ ~ ~

 I love that I have this story of my Dad's unwavering faith.
I love that all these years later his testimony, passed on through a witness,
 still stands fresh and bold in my heart.


I love that I can say it too.

I will still mourn. Tears will still flow. And I will still say,

"The Lord gives and the Lord takes away. 
Blessed be the name of the Lord."

Heat Wave

What do you do when it's too hot to be outside 

and the brother is sick so you have to stay home all day?

MAKE STUFF!!!

Thanks to our Pinterest addiction, we have plenty of inspiration.

Hanna started off the fun by glitzing up her chargers.

Really?

Well, I guess we won't get them confused anymore.

That must have wet her appetite,

because before you can say "hot glue gun" we were whipping up a crayon storm.

Crayons? Check.
Canvas? Check.
Hot glue gun? Check.
Blow dryer? Check.
Three girls? Check.

We had everything we needed right here at home.

Perfection!

Hum...wonder what they'll create tomorrow?

~ ~ ~

Since we are having so much fun with the girls today,

why not throw in another one of their favorites:

Kid History videos.


My kids quote these videos all the live long day.

This one is a household favorite...

I can't explain it, but it's funny stuff.

FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACT!

The little things

In the morning, these flowers glow with sunshine outside my kitchen door.

So last week I took a few pictures, 
hoping to savor that basket of beauty 
before the dirty breakfast dishes called my name.

Then came the gift I might have missed;

a humming bird, wings catching the light for just an instant in my camera lens.

Click--I got it!!!  What a treasure!!!

I keep a close eye on that basket now. 

I'm hoping to see Mr. Hummingbird again.

If I don't come to the window and watch for him, 

I might not notice him, even though he's there.

~ ~ ~

Dear God, 
fill me with such hopeful anticipation, 
that I would eagerly seek to be in Your presence.
May each day be filled with grateful awareness of You.
Amen

All Along

Spring was way more busy than I like. 

Rarely a minute alone.  Rarely a minute together.
We are just beginning to slow down.

As my hundreds of pictures are loaded onto the computer,
my eyes finally see what the hurried pace left behind.

The lens has seen and saved what I was missing. 
God was pouring out the gifts all along.

And now,

finally,

weeks later,

thanks to the lens that saved bits and pieces,

I thankfully receive the gifts.


I see them here in the ordinary moments,

the rare moments,

the little bits of progress,

the sticky and sweet,

the bright and sunny,

the gorgeous growing,

the mysteriously made,

the  warm and fuzzy,

 the sleepy and furry,

the formal and fancy,

the fun lovey-dovey,

the simple and quiet, 

   the new old favorites,

and the surprise floating finds.

It's all so good.  It all matters.

 And I don't want to miss a thing.

Thank you, Hanna, for sharing a few!

For My Babies

 Hanna

Gabby

Jacob

 Josie

YOU are what makes my Mother's Day happy!

If I could sing, I'd sing this for you.

My heart is yours.

LOVE,

Mom

~ ~ ~

One more thing...

Happy Mother's Day,

Mom.

I love you too!

Do you hear what I hear? Part 2

Last night I took Gabby to an awards ceremony where she won a red ribbon for her gorgeous painted tissue paper collage of a blue jay. I am thrilled. Not just that she was awarded, but that young artist like her have this opportunity to showcase their art and be recognized for their gifts.

Next week Hanna will have the opportunity to showcase her photography too. I am so glad. These budding artists of mine need these opportunities in their life. They need to get the message that art is important, that their creativity has significance. They need to know it matters.

I need to know too.

~ ~ ~

In school, 

I was the girl who could draw.

Academics? Average.

Sports?  Not so much.

Music?  So-so.

Socially?  Super shy.

Art was my thing to be good at.

 (painted this from a "how to paint" book for my Dad in middle school)

My friends knew it.

My teachers knew it.

My parents knew it.

Then came high school in a town that was over 30 miles away.

Nobody there knew it.

How could they really? 

I think there was an art room.

But no art teacher.

No art classes.

Without a way to grow it or show it, my gift was mostly hidden away.

My senior year I finally had the opportunity to display some art in the school hallway.

(oooh....the fashion phase-- probably copied from the Spiegel catalog)

Afterwards, a teacher said to me,

"I had NO idea! There's a whole other side of you I never knew."

Yep.  

Except to me it wasn't just a side. 

(painted this in high school. it was basically copied from an illustration in a book. 

mom framed it and hung it an the wall. are you noticing I copied things?  that's how you teach yourself!)

I'm so thankful I had my parent's encouragement and support. 

They signed me up for whatever art classes you could find in my small town, 

sent me away to art camp, and framed my artwork to hang on the walls.  

But my formative and art-less high school experience sent me a different message:

Art doesn't matter here.
Sorry.
Should've played sports.
Should've played in the band.
Should've been the smart one.

Somewhere down deep the message my heart heard was this:

If art doesn't matter,
 then maybe...

neither does my gift.

There it is.

  

Do you hear it?

The lie that mingles so closely with what we believe to be true. 

 It's sneaky like that and hard to recognize.

It's subtle enough for you to accept it without a fight.

I didn't see it then, but I see it now.

The lie was just beginning to slither it's roots down into the foundation of my heart.

~ ~ ~



"The story of your life is the long and brutal assault on your heart
by the one who knows what you could be and fears it."
~John Eldredge, Waking the Dead

(Read Part 1 HERE)

Sunday Slide

You might think this is a strange picture for a Sunday Slide,

 but let me tell you what I remember.

1. Always having a Saturday night bath for church on Sunday.

2. Yellow vinyl dining chairs that stuck to your bare legs.

3. Sitting in said vinyl chairs to watch TV.  Who ever heard of sitting on a sofa?

4. Leaning over the vinyl chairs to watch TV like Sue and Jeff are here. 

    That's what you do when your TV is  located in the dining room.

5. Staring at the TV the same way my kids do. 

    Anyone else still have nightmares from watching "Land of the Lost?"

6. That lovely carpet--even in the kitchen. Please explain the logic of a carpeted kitchen?

7. The mid-century modern decor. Apparently mint green trim goes with everything.

8. Always the paper grocery bag on the kitchen counter for a garbage can.  Why?

10. Crunchy candy cake decorations that Mom always put on our birthday cake. 

      I think that is what I'm snacking on in the picture.

There. Not bad for one picture. 

Wasn't that fun? Now I'll give YOU a turn!  

You get ten points for each little memory you can add for the following picture.  Ready? Set? Go!!!!